Francesco (Rupert Everett) is a sad sack of a cemetery caretaker who is battling a low-grade zombie uprising when he gets about as lucky as you can: Following a funeral, he hooks up with the insanely hot widow, played by Italian sex bomb Anna Falchi. They do it right there on the grave, all naked and everything. Then the dead husband shows up and bites his widow, after which Francesco shoots her, believing she has turned zombie. Or did he just murder his one true love? Buzzkill!